A Day in My ADHD Mind
“Do you hear something?” Part of my brain, the part that monitors my surroundings, called to the others. Let’s call this part Sentry. It pays attention to what’s going on around the body. Little things like proximity, sounds, and patterns of other people.
“Ignore it,” said the internalizing part of my brain. I think I’ll call that part I-Vert. Short for Introvert, not inverted, in case you might have thought that. “It’s just the alarm. Have the body turn it off and go back to bed.”
“Nope. Nope. Can’t do that. Things to do. So much to do.” Yeah, that’s my brain's version of Hammy from Over the Hedge. Don’t be surprised when there are contradictions in the thought process. Not sure what to call this part. Maybe Do-Don’t. Sure. Let’s go with that.
Now you know the major parts of my mind. Sentry, I-Vert, and Do-Don’t. There is another player. Master C. Doesn’t say much but commands silence when he begins to work. Now, where was I?
“Hush,” Sentry whispered. “Turn off the alarm and get back under the blankets. It got cold. The body doesn’t like the cold.”
“Yeah,” I-Vert chimes in. “Or being exposed.”
“We’re the only ones awake,” Do-Don’t said. “But we have to keep the body warm. Yeah. Maybe make some coffee. That’s downstairs. Have to put on the warm robe. It’s colder than it was last night. Why is it colder? Can’t use the light robe. Do you feel that? I think we need to use the bathroom. Get the coffee going first.”
“Great,” huffed I-Vert. “Now I’ve lost the dream. Nice going.”
“Okay. Be quick.” Sentry said. “Don’t get the ankles caught in the - too late.”
“Are you trying to kill us?” I-Vert smacked Do-Don’t. “Someone probably heard that. We need to get the coffee made before anyone else wakes up.”
“Where’s the footwear? Oh, yeah, really need to go now. Is the coffee ready?” Do-Don’t asked.
“Where’s the water? You have to prepare the coffee maker before it can be ready.” Do-Don’t told the others.
“You’re doing it again,” Sentry said. “Quit talking to yourself and just get it done. Watch out for the corner.” The body’s hand smacked into the wall as the half-asleep legs stepped into the kitchen.
After going through the morning ritual of bathroom, coffee, and other things, I found myself somewhat awake. I still didn’t have any clear thoughts. Just a lot of random things going through my head.
“Okay, so we have that article to write. Yeah, we should work on that first. What was the article going to be about? ADHD? Depression? We had some pretty downer thoughts yesterday. What about those?”
“I don’t want to share those,” I-Vert said.
“Maybe we can add a fiction story. We haven’t added one those in a while. And we need to check the email. Have we caught up with the client work? There’s a meeting today. Remember that. One O’Clock. And then we have to…”
“And he fell asleep.” Sentry sighed. “Give him a minute. He’ll wake up.”
“Let him sleep. He was driving me crazy last night. Kept interrupting the dream sequence. There’s an order to these things.”
“See if there was anything added to the comments. Hey, have we checked on our friends lately? I don’t think we have.”
“If they wanted to hear from us, they would send us a message.”
“Maybe they did. We’ll have to check all our sources. Ooh, there’s an article about something interesting. What did David post? Oh, it’s another cross-post. Is it interesting? Sounds like it might be. Ooh, there’s a post from Kent, let’s read that. Ooh, Juju and Lulu have a new post. Let’s check that out. What’s the next video? That’s interesting. I’m getting hungry. The coffee cup is empty. We should fill it. What were we going to work on? Oh yeah, we need to find out what happened with Jarod and Miss Parker. Is it getting hot in here?”
“I tried to tell you it was getting hotter. Now the body is sweating.” Sentry said.
“Let’s just take a break for a while,” I-Vert offered. “I hope the phone doesn’t ring.”
“Wow, look at what time it is. Did anyone else know it was this late already? What have we been doing for half the day? Did we eat? I don’t remember if we ate or not. Those were some good articles on LinkedIn. Do you remember them? I don’t. Just parts, but they were good. Let’s check the emails. Oh, right. Already went through them. Don’t we have some writing to do? I think I’ll open that file. And that one. And that one. And, I don’t remember writing this one. Let’s read it.”
A silence fell over the group. Even Do-Don’t closed his mouth in reverence. The presence of Master C filled the area. Without a word, Master C began working. Word after word filled the blank pages on the computer. Before long, a short story had emerged.
“I don’t create anything,” Master C said once. “I simply do my best to recreate what I’m shown.”
Sometimes, the entire mind is filled with the wonderful and frightening worlds Master C connects to. You can hear every sound. Smell every scent. Sometimes, depending on how close the connection to someone is, you can taste what they taste. It’s an incredible experience.
When the work is finished, at least for the time being, Master C departs. Where he goes is anyone's guess. Perhaps he goes to one of the many worlds he records. Perhaps it is here that he visits and there that the resides.
“Ok. I’m going to read it.” I-Vert said. He goes through what Master C had written and corrects minor errors in spelling or punctuation. Occasionally he’ll change a sentence or two but nothing big. He doesn’t dare to presume what Master C intended.
“The day is done. It’s time to go to bed. We need to get ready for bed. There’s a meeting thing in the morning. We don’t want to oversleep. The alarm is set. We need to shut down for the night. I-Vert is going to give us some good dreams. I’m going to help. I have so many ideas. I’ll tell you all about it after we put the body to sleep.”
At the end of the day, Sentry gets everyone tucked in, curled up, and ready for the night. Do-Don’t continues yammering while I-Vert conducts the orchestra of mental images. Even in sleep, the activity never ceases.